Tuesday, October 7, 2014

damn...I guess I should shave



 

…..most cultural customs have traceable origins…..so who started the crap….it wasn’t till the mid 1900’s that women even wore sleeveless dresses….I guess they didn’t want that furry underarm look…… the 1940’s  gals where sporting shorter hemlines…..sheerer stocking …and of course the Pin-Up gals…..ooo lala…..suddenly sleek..smooth & hair free was the all the rage…..we can’t forget about our naughty bits……nobody sports carpet on their who who any more……it’s all about the Brazilian…for hundreds of years waxing was the way to go……it was common practice among groups known for their extreme modesty…in the middle east  & north Africa brides would remove all their body hair for their wedding night….

 


…I grew up watching my glamorous mon shave her legs……I think I was around 12/13 when I started to shave my own lets…..I even talked my  little brother into shaving his legs…..if you know him..you know how laugh out loud funny that is…..LOL…..it didn’t take me long to realize it was a ridiculous ritual…..now at 51 I can’t seem to stay “au naturelle” for too long…..a few months yes….lol……I am fortunate I have light colored hair & not much of them…so you really don’t notice how hairy my legs are until you get up close & personal…..I do know it’s time to shave my legs when I can feel the hair blowing in the wind…..

 

…hair removal has evolved over the years…..who remembers the Epilady……promises of easy painless hair removal……seriously?  Then of course there is the Nair…rub on & like magic the hair disappears…….in my case it only disappears until I put my glasses on & can see clearly again…..last but not least is the handy dandy Daisy razor…..pink..of all colors……now days they have all kinds of different razors each saying they do a better job than the other…..whatever..a blade is a blade….

 

…lets talk wax…..I will admit I have had my basement (wink wink) floors waxed…..hurts like a som bitch…..but it’s not something I have done often….I personally think that if women are gonna wax their who whos they should go  to a professional…..you have all heard of the Sally Henson’s home waxing kit ..not the ones they sell in 2014…but the ones they sold in 1993……let me tell you my experience…..or should I say demise…..

 


…..1993….Dover Oh apartment….decided I needs smooth floors for my upcoming visit to my future hubby’s place in AK…….well ……being the read all the women’s magazines vast knowledge of all things girl kinda chic I am….or should I say..”was”  ok  ook…am…lol….I didn’t bother to read the directions…all those years if watching my mom heat up her bees wax with a candle to do her eyebrows……oh hell I knew what to do……lol…..so after heating up my wax in the microwave……to like a 1000 degrees I am sure…I slather that wax one…..it burnt my who who like a mother f#$ker…..but me..the old wise one…decided more is better…..so I put on more …..and more…..so them I decided maybe I would wait a few minutes before yanking the wax off…maybe let it cool down so it gets all those wayward who who hairs…….bad bad BAD idea……

 


…after tugging & pulling for what seemed like hours I could not get that clumpy cold wax off my who who…..I pulled..tugged…yanked…..nope…not budging…that wax was stuck.  So there I was…stark as naked from the bottom down..trying not to panic…..it was like..think think think…….if I put ice on the wax it may just come off in little chunks…..nope…….I had no choice put to swallow my pride……..the next thing I know I am standing in the bathroom doorway… using the doorframe as a brace while my roommate is down on her knees trying her darndest to pull that clumpy cold wax off my who who…..it wasn’t pretty nor was it enjoyable in the least……but I knew once all the wax was gone I would have a smooth shinny sleep hairless who who…..NOT!  There was just as much hair there after the wax was removed as before……time to dig out the Daisy….LOL

 

..now in 2014……I still like the smooth sleek look..especially since I have a who who piercing…..but I stick to my old faithful razor…..double blades of course…lol  …one last thought…….can you imagine being that professional who waxes who whos???  I am not sure I could do it….I am all about a pretty who who…but some are just not so pretty..or fresh…’nough said…Uhg!

 

No comments: