Wednesday, November 27, 2013

damn...I gotta run....



…why do we say….I need a pair of panty hose?  Just like our panties…we say I need a pair of panties or a pair of undies…why so we refer to panty hose as a pair….last I checked my pantyhose were one piece….even my naughty crotch- less ones …..don’t even act surprised….if you know me at all…you know I own more than a couple of  pairs of crotch less pantyhose…


….one of the many frustrating things about pantyhose…..not an issue with stocking/garter belts…just sayin….when ya buy pantyhose….even though you buy the right size..or what you think is the right size…they may not be…pantyhose are so unpredictable & so very unforgiving…..I especially love it when the label says “one size fits all”…..pleeeze…..what a crock of shit! 

 …ya know even if you can pull up your pantyhose..they can still somehow turn out to be too small….they have the ability to start to shrink as soon as you leave the house….by the time you get to where you are going the crotch is at mid-thigh with the waistband at  mid-butt…ya  spend the rest of the day hiking those babies up…eventually you will have a runner from top to bottom….


….it is interesting how pantyhose succumb to gravitational forces…..baggy knees & ankles…..the only temporary fix is to pull them up at the waistband…..sometimes even pulling them up to the bra …even tucking them under the bra just to hold those babies up….we have all done that…just admit it…lol

…ya know Allen Grant invented pantyhose in 1959…go figure…a man invented them..lol…..by the 1970s & 80’s pantyhose were in every chicks wardrobe….but by the end of the 90’s the fashion pendulum headed more towards casual..pantyhose sales declined …tights & trouser socks were born…….these days chicks no longer feel pressure to sport those uncomfy pantyhose…..bare legs work…it’s our choice…..to wear or not to wear…..basically I have a strong dislike for pantyhose.....but they do make my legs look good....and we all know if it looks good it is sooo worth the discomfort.....kinda like wearing a bra....we all know what a tremendous relief ya feel when you peel off your bra after a long day....pantyhose.........love them...or hate them......the once ubiquitous women's accessory was a revolutionary invention that helped transform women’s fashion.........you decide.





Tuesday, November 26, 2013

...love this guy...now



....middle age crazy...

.....sometime in my late 40’s I had this sudden realization that I was no longer who I had been.....I was a some-what attractive chick who navigated the world partially assisted by the advantage of being cute..funny  and full of personality....in my 40’s Spanx found their way into my lingerie drawer...men who asked me if I “had the time” really just wanted to know the time...imagine that!  At some point I crossed a line into strange new territory.....one in which I no longer felt like the me I thought I was...
 
me....aka...formerly hot chick....was bitch slapped into a whole new category of myself....of life.....kinda like a “tweens”,,,,,not really old..or middle aged.....but no longer reckless.....foot loose or fancy free....gravity defying chick.....yes...my hubby..bless his heart overly reassures me that I am..in fact ...still hot...but more in a not-so-young kinda way.....lol
 
...no...I am not looking for or fishing for compliments.......I know at 50 I have my god days & I still look fine...that the problem...at this point in my life fine is not good enough....don’t get me wrong....I am well aware that a chick’s hotness is not necessarily proportional to how many candles she has on her cake.....
 
...yep...getting older ...even if you are not old..can sometime suck the big one.......I am shocked every time I look in the mirror...who is that person staring back at me...mom is that you......lol.....I am so tired of hearing I need to embrace the changes.....50 is the new 40 is the new 30 is now the new 20......like hell......lol.....
 

...a positive unexpected side effect of “middle age’ is the mental transformation.....I never really understood why chicks seem to go off the deep end.....at is till now....at 50.....I could deny growing older and pretend my birthdays away......come to think of it...do I really want to.....I like having a hall pass for breaking outta the box...pushing the boundaries......getting a get out of jail card of sorts for things like tattoos.....playing football.....among other crazy what the hell am I thinking kinda stuff...I love it.....I like my kinda middle crazy.  

……frazzled rather than dazzled....

……frazzled rather than  dazzled..melt down alert


…..let me say I love my family…that being said….spending long periods of time with family can be both awesome & exhausting…keep the peace….dealing with the awkwardness & doing my best to keep things under control…when exactly it the time to enjoy the fun stuff…..especially if you have a touch of the ODC thing going on…..the stress & craziness of it all…what was I thinking?! ..its extremely counterproductive to what the holiday symbolizes….yeah yeah…I know it’s all about family coming together..being thankful …for me it is more about keeping my house clean & orderly..spend quality time with my family…. turkey day meal that  is yummy and ready on time…… a dash of the social hostess…cook & head bottle washer …throw an apron on and call it a day……again…what the hell was I thinking?

….I so agree it is so important to step back & decide what kind of holiday season you wanna experience…..make decisions based on that vision….turkey day officially starts the holiday season…the question is  how do we prepare ourselves to create & enjoy the holiday season for ourselves & our family…..I try really hard to keep things simple…..famous last words……the last few years we have hosted a holiday party……this year it is a turkey day feast..that it..no other holiday party  hosting for me……..of course I say that every year & then pull some sort of  tinsel outta my ass & host a party…not this year!


…No over-commitments  for me!  ..it is so easy to fall victim to the “sure”..”yes”…”of coure”…”would love it”….”count on me”…”sounds like fun”…before really…I mean REALLY thinking about it….overbooking the holiday season just sucks  all the joy out of it….by saying “no thanks” you are actually saying “yes” to yourself…your commitment to de-stressing…to a more meaningful relaxing holiday season.

.. No more last minute…..before things get even crazier & more crowded & I find myself wandering aimlessly fighting the crowds…busting a vein…sweating my ass off….swollen knees…..and achy feet at the mall trying to get everything for everyone…stop..take the time to make my list..create a game plan…order what I can online..with free shipping of course…..the older I get the less I enjoy the mall..especially at during the holiday season…I must be getting old….



…No over spending….this year I am gonna do my best to be creative….not gonna over spend…no need to keep up with the Jone’s….who are the Jones’s anyway…..I don’t know about you but the only Jone’s I know are back woods red neck hillbillys……oh…that’s it……I get it now……the idea is to drink moonshine like the Jones’s…..holiday stress no more!

Monday, November 18, 2013



...whats your style....


 
…everyone has their own style of  everything from the way they sign their name to the way they fold their undies….it’s what makes us different or unique….lately I have been things about my personal style…more specific…my  signature fashion style…..I have always had a passion for passion…goes back to my Barbie dolls…I loved playing Barbie’s..changing their clothes…I used to spend hours& hours dressing them & undressing…

 
.as I became a teenager and packed my Barbie dolls away I loves shopping for clothes…I read all the Teen magazines…all the catalogs…as a young adult I played with a few different looks…not so sure I would call it fashion….lol…. I did everything from the leather & lace Cyndi Lauper  look…to the half shaved Boy George hairstyle…..I also spent years sporting the cotton button down & penny loafers….then there was the skin tight jeans I had to lay on the bed & use pliers to pull up the zipper…..sad but true…..then of course there was the professional look of the power suit with the matching hose & shoes……

 


…..after my daughter was born I sported some extra weight….my daily uniform was legging& oversized shirts…..I kinda lost…or better yet misplaced my passion for fashion…my focus was my daughter & being a mommy…..I returned to work after a 6 yr hiatus…it didn’t take long for me to rekindle that fashion spark…..back then I was kinda caught up in the mind set of what a mom should wear…..kinda frumpy…..sad but true….I sported that loom for about a year..

 


…I landed a job as an assistance manager of a Lane Bryant store…..the fashion sparks flew…..unfortunately they flew in all different directions….I tried so many looks…some worked…some were just down right sad….I was never afraid of fashion….so in the end it all worked…..I was all over the fashion spectrum for a while…it has taken several years for me to find my signature style…….to be honest I am still a work in progress…I am trying to fine tune my style….I still take fashion risks….I just seem to struggle with the idea of downsizing my wardrobe…

 

…yesterday I cleaned & organized my closet…an overwhelming task…..but I did it…..in case you didn’t know…2013 has been my Thrift Store Fashion Challenge…..I only bought clothing..accessories..etc from thrift stores….don’t freak…I bought undies & bras BRAND NEW! …anyway…I did great from Jan till Nov…didn’t bother me at all…actually had fun & let me tell you nothing tastes better than saving a buck & finding an awesome outfit – dirt cheap!  ..I did however fall off the wagon a couple of weeks ago…a moment of weakness…..I bout a couple of tops & a couple pair of jeans..they were on sale…lol  …I have to say I have done pretty well up till that point..

 


…now I have a closet….actually two closets…and several drawers…plus a few under the bed storage bad full of clothes…….so I am thinking I have way too much….so I am thinking it is time to rethink this…this meaning….my accumulation of clothes& accessories…..what is my signature style…..how do I achieve the signature style I want…..hmmmmmm…….

 

 

 …I read an article in Real Simple magazine…www.realsimple.com….I love the name..real & simple…..two of my favorite words…lol…..here is what I learned & I wanna share….also here is a really cool printable assessment sheet to help you find your signature style….


 


 Take a serious assessment of your overall current style, deciding if you are traditional, modern, fashion-forward, casual, hippie natural, etc.

1.     Determine what you are trying to accomplish with your signature style -- to be more memorable, develop an always chic look or have more fun with fashion.

2.     Study famous tastemakers -- everyone from Karl Lagerfeld with his ponytail and fan to Carrie Donovan and her oversized glasses, black clothes and blond hair.

3.     Don't hesitate to imitate a look and make it your own, making sure it fits into your current style and personality.

4.     Decide what you would be most comfortable changing -- your hair, wardrobe colors or accessories.

5.     If you're choosing a striking new hairstyle or color, try the new look in stages to see how it works.

6.     If you are choosing a bold new wardrobe color, start by incorporating it as a shirt, tie or scarf color to see how well it works for you.

7.     Relying on accessories -- sunglasses, big pins, bright hosiery or vintage handbags -- is a safe, easy and inexpensive way to start a personalized look.

8.     Experiment and alter your signature style piece as you grow more confident.

9.    Once you have the groove of your signature look, be sure to change your supporting wardrobe frequently enough so that you don't look the same everyday. 

Tips:

1.     Use your signature style to camouflage flaws or draw attention to your best features.

2.    Try not to cross the fine line between signature style and affectation

3.    A signature look can be something as sentimental as a charm bracelet or as breezy as brightly colored pantyhose -- just make sure it feels like you and fits your personality and lifestyle. 

 


 

Define Your Signature Style


Create a signature look and avoid buyer’s remorse with this four-step plan.


Step 1: Identify What’s Working

You probably have a handful of go-to pieces you instinctively reach for when you want to look put-together. Now imagine having a rack full of them. The first step toward achieving that goal is figuring out what makes those favorites. so, well, favored, says Amy E. Goodman, the author of Wear This, Toss That  “Pull out the five things you would wear every day if no one was keeping track,” she says. Choose something in each clothing category: tops, pants, dresses, and skirts. Then ask yourself a few questions about each piece How would you describe the item? Crisp and tailored? Soft and ruffly?

·        What image does it project? Smart and professional? Edgy and fashionable?

·        What color is it? Does the shade brighten your complexion?

·        What fabric is it made of?

·        What is the silhouette like? Nipped at the waist? Flowing and hip-grazing?

·        What parts of your body does it accentuate?

·        What parts of your body does it de-emphasize? Is it comfortable?


Your answers reveal: Your style barometer. Use your notes to help pinpoint what you like. “Be careful of buying replicates,” says Goodman. You may learn you prefer darks and flared shapes, but you need only one good pair of black bootcuts. “Think of it as nailing down a signature look, not getting into a rut,” she says.

 Step 2: Analyze Your Mistake….Like rehashing a bad relationship, this cringe-inducing (yet cathartic) exercise helps ensure that you don’t go down the same dead ends again. Ready? Take out five things you wish you hadn’t bought and ask yourself the questions in step one, plus the questions below. Then let go of those items, plus anything else that’s not pulling its weight—even if it still has its tags or it will be perfect once you lose 10 pounds or you have friends who throw fancy parties. “Your wardrobe should reflect who you are now,” says Kendall Farr, the author of Style Evolution  “Don’t hang on to images of what worked for you 10 or 20 years ago.”                      

·        Do you have anywhere to wear this?

·        Is it high-maintenence?

·        Does it make you feel old and frumpy? Or young and silly?

·        Is it poor quality?

·        Did you buy it for the thrill of the bargain?

·        Did you buy it only because it was trendy?

·        Was it a panic purchase for a big event?

·        Does the color make you look pale? Yellow? Ruddy?


Your answers reveal: Your shopping blind spots. (Write down details about your mistakes so you never waste another cent falling into the same trap.) If your favorite pieces are tailored and crisp, that’s why you’re not reaching for the ruffled chiffon top. If sales or the newest trends are your weakness, you don’t have to give up clearance racks or Forever 21. But you will want to hold firm to your “likes” and “dislikes” lists.

 

 Step 3: I.D. the Missing Pieces in Your Wardrobe…..Separate your clothes by type. Ideally, you want to have three times as many tops as bottoms—the same ratio you see in stores, says Julie Watson, a wardrobe consultant and a former senior director of merchandising for Banana Republic. “No one remembers your pants,” she says. “We associate with people from the waist up.” Watson also suggests a 60-40 balance of staples (timeless, solid-color pieces) to novelty items (prints, funky details). To refine what you need, write down your responses to these questions  What items would make the pieces you own more versatile? (For instance, a polka-dot blouse to perk up a pencil skirt or pointy-toe flats to make cropped pants look less casual.)

·        Do you spend most days in a corporate environment but have a closet full of cheery sundresses? (It might lift your spirits more if you invested in a new suit that makes you feel great.)

·        Have there been occasions (maybe a dressy dinner, a job interview, or a funeral) when you were at a loss about what to wear?

·        Do you need to update any go-to items that you’ve reached for one too many times (say, a pair of overly dry-cleaned black pants, a wool suit with shine marks, or a ring-around-the-collar white blouse)?


Your answers reveal: The only things you should be buying. (Stay strong!)

 

Step 4: Shop Smarter

Take your lists of likes, dislikes, and needs and head to the mall. But before opening your wallet, run through this checklist to determine whether a piece will last the long haul. This may seem tedious, but if it prevents pricey mistakes, it’s worth the effort, right? After a while, you’ll automatically ask yourself these questions.

Will it work with your lifestyle?


·        The more an item costs, the more seriously you want to consider these factors.

·        Where will you wear it? Ideally, this is a place you go every week or month.

·        Does it coordinate with at least three other pieces in your wardrobe?

·        Can you wear it year-round? Imagine it with tights, a sweater, or open-toe shoes.

·        Can you picture yourself wearing it next season? Next year? In five years?

·        Will the effort of hand washing or dry-cleaning prevent you from wearing it regularly?

 

Is it good quality?


This quick inspection is the fashion equivalent of kicking the tires.

Buttons: Give them a tug to see if they’re well anchored, and look for frayed thread.
Embellishments: Steer clear of stretched seams and excess glue around beading.
Fabric: Test if the material is a lint magnet by rubbing it with a fluffy white knit.
Lining: Make sure it lies flat, without bubbling or poking out from underneath.
Pattern: Eyeball plaids and stripes; they should line up perfectly at the seams.
Seams: Check that the stitches are small and straight—no loose or jumbled threads.

 

 

 

Step 4: Shop Smarter

Does it fit and flatter?


In the dressing room, be merciless.

1. Look at yourself from all angles.
Pay attention to often overlooked areas.

Shoulders: The seams need to align with the tips of your shoulder bones.
Bust: The garment should lie flat against the body without pulling, puckering buttons, or bubbles of excess fabric.
Waistband: If it bunches up when you add a belt, it’s too big. Muffin top? It’s way too small. Find a happy medium.
Rise: This is a tough alteration, so if the crotch is snug or droops low, the item goes directly into the no pile.
Thighs: The fabric should hug curves smoothly, not pinch the backs of the legs.

2. Stand up straight and assess the length. In general, shirts should fall between your waist and hips; long sleeves, at the wrist bones. Pants should brush the tops of the shoes you plan to pair them with (or be alterable). Skirt lengths vary, but a hemline just at the kneecap flatters most body types.
3. Evaluate the give factor of stretchy clothing, particularly jeans. Wear them for 10 minutes or so while you’re trying on tops. If they get saggy, go down a size.
4. Imitate real life. Bend over and sit down in skirts and pants. Do they ride up/pull down/dig in? With jackets and tops, Watson suggests a test she used with fit models for Banana Republic. “Give yourself a hug,” she says, then lean over to “pick up the groceries” and reach up to “ride the subway.” The garment shouldn’t feel constricting or expose your midriff.

Wait! Don’t clip those tags just yet.


At home, try on your purchase with items from your closet and in natural light to be sure it’s truly a good match. Because in the end, the payoff of finding the right fit is worth more than any bargain.

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Alicia Keys - Girl On Fire


Reba McEntire - If I Were A Boy


...lost ?


.......romance is.............


......just a bunch of junk

.....back in August I committed to doing the Armory Craft show in Dover, Ohio.....which was last weekend.......I had intentions to create up-cycled men's wool plaid sports coats into messenger bags...which is a really cool idea if I do say so myself....well to make a long story short...do to the craziness I call my life...and just being lazy I decided to start creating my items to sell on the Monday prior......in four days..with help from my daughter & hubby I am happy to say I had things to show at the craft fair......sold a few items...gave alot of my junky treasures away to family & friends....but in the end I had a great weekend.                                                                                                      
This is my side of the table.......I went with the vintage look.....used an old lamp & suit case......I thought it was vintage chic.




Here are a few of my junk.......




Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Monica - Love All Over Me




…go ahead & do it



…just say yes..you know ya wanna…

…few things in life are fun & free…sex is one of those things…well…sometimes sex does cost $...among other things ….I read some famous fella wrote “sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. the other eight are unimportant”….just as sex begets even less sex….reinstitution of sex begets more sex…sometimes even better sex…kinda like potato chips…..ya can’t just eat one…

…what about sex at midlife…yes I said midlife…as much as it pains me I have reached the mid-point of my life…although I would much rather just say I am …the big FIVE O! ..but yes indeed mid-life has entered my world…it is hard to fight nature…when it comes to of sex & enjoyment of sex…I have to wonder if it is true what they say…if ya don’t use it..ya loose it…..I always heard that if ya don’t have sex in 7 yrs your who who grows shut…lol

…mid-life messes up a gals game….srews with you sevuality…..its hard to feel sexy whey you are flash-flushing all the time…let alone the moodiness…one minute you are primed & ready for some action…..then your hubby..or who ever..gives you that little look…in a snap you are outta the mood….has nothing to do with them….its this mid-life craziness……if you get past all that…you have to deal with the dryness….of yes the who who dryness….how many times have you heard yourself say…just spit on it & stick it in!.....rember how juicy you once were…that aahhh you used to feel every time you had a sexy naught thought…..these days I need a bit more than one little old sexual thought…..

...remember the days when sex was always on your mind…then poof….the mid-life fairy drops a load on ya & now sex is something you remember liking…once you get started you do get aroused ..orgasms are still the bomb..they just make take a little longer….but somehow sex has somewhat fallen off your priority list…or has it?   I run hot and cold…..when I want it I want it…when I don’t…stay the hell away from me…lol  No one knows that better than my poor hubby….the poor fella never asks anymore…he has been turned dowm so much…I guess he figures I am gonna say no..so what do I do…..good thing his is a handy man….

…at this point…mid-life’s craziness….intimacy leads to sexual arousal….don’t get me wrong…I like a good ol nasty banging every once in awhile…..I think men walk around more or less in a continual state of desire….they become little boys with a new toy….a toy that they assume all woman wanna play with…all a guy needs is an erotic image….see a little boobie cleavage…or a perky nipple  & BAMB….they are ready for action…..

…I am pretty sure it is the opposite for chicks…..at this point in the game how many women get excited seeing their hubby’s walk around in their undies…..or in their cowboy jammies….lol….most chicks want some sort of intimacy first…don’t get me wrong…a good grab & throw down never hurt anyone….but the closeness ya feel when you & your fella talk, snuggle, blah blah blah creates trust & intimacy…in turn desire…in other words …..horny…

..I guess no matter where you are in your relationship…giving yourself permission to a sexual….powerful….centered..…peaceful …etc..etc..etc…chick in the prime of your life is wildly alluring & oh so fulfilling……but as in everything it is a work in progress…definitely takes daily inner…and sometimes outer work & attention to yourself…..getting your mid-life body & mind back on track and in balance…and re-ignite the fire down below…the hard part is turning on your brain…loving yourself unconditionally….forget about the sand that has shifted in your hourglass shape…embrace your imperfections….. do little things that make you feel sexy….wear sexy panties…..read erotic books…check out porn on the internet…..lets do a shout out to Al Gore…..if he wouldn’t have invented the internet how would we see porn so freely????!.

…whatever we do….us middle aged chicks need to keep our sexy alive & strong….we may have a low every now & then….but the highs are over the top can’t wait to get it on again AWESOME! So go ahead & do…..you know ya wanna!

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

......sparkling white minty fresh..........

....I will be the first to admit I do some pretty lame brain whack-a-doodle things......but last night...might just be in my top 10 crazy ass OMG what the hell kinda moments......

...first let me just say I had a clean shaven who who kinda weekend...wink wink.....and I assume that all chicks have a little itch down under as the who who fuzz grows back in.....sometimes it itches like crazy.....well I have discovered this little thing called Destine....yes its the same stuff ya use on baby's butts......I don't know if it really works or does anything about the itch.....but in my mind it works....

...sooooo last night as I was changing in to my jammies.....I thought hmmmmmm......I should put some Destine on my who who....kinda like shinning the hard wood floors......lol....well I went into my bathroom...I didn't turn the light on because there is a window in my bathroom with a rattan window blind which looks really cool.....however I noticed the other evening that when the light is on in the bathroom you can see EVERYTHING.......didn't know that....blinds been on for like 6 months......that must be why my neighbor guy is to nice to me....he is getting a free peep show.....lol

...so in the dark bathroom...I reached into the cabinet to get my Destine.....I squeezed it in my hand & proceeded  to smother my who who area with the cream.......HOWEVER.....instead of the soothing sensation of creamy anti itch relaxing calmness down below......I felt an icy cold breezy tingling   sensation........its was almost like eating a peppermint patty.......ok maybe not...lol  

.....lets just say I now have a sparkling white minty fresh who who compliments of Crest Ultra White Toothpaste.   Yes...yes I did!

 

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

...free yourself


..I like it slow…




…we all get that feeling of being pulled in million different directions….if you are like me the “to-do” list is never ending….sneaking away to find a little slice of time for yourself….like when does that really happen – not in my world….relaxation…really????....logically I know how important it is to have “me time”…but like so many busy chicks out there it just doesn’t seem to happen….so many other things demand our attention….kids….hubby…house..work…the list goes on & one….there is ALWAYS something  or someone who needs me…..at this point in my life…at 50..I ask myself….is being a 10mph mom/wife/maid/career/cook/taxi driver….etc etc etc….really how I want to live my life?????????????

 

...isn’t that how all of us feel from time to time…..  so the million dollar question is how do I slow my life down so I can enjoy it?  ….. time to reevaluate priorities…..performance evaluation of sorts…what keeps me going 100-mph ….time to take a deep hard look at the reasoning behind my busy-ness…..

 

…the first things that comes to mind is pride…..I am thinking pride is a huge reason behind my busy-ness…I for one overestimate my self importance….I assume that if I don’t do it – no one else will….everything depends on me…I carry the weight of my world on my shoulders…..the true truth is I am only indispensable until I say no….enough is enough…..it is way past time for me at add “me” to my to-do list…..I NEED to learn the word NO….and just just when my hubby wanst sex & am am too tired from my crazy busy day…lol……I need to set boundaries…slow down…stop living that crazy ass bust life….focus on what’s important…enjoy all that life has to offer. .